Episode 8: My controversial take about faith, survival, and learning to have your own back.

In Episode 8 of The Jamerrill Show, Jamerrill shares her “controversial take” on what it means to be your greatest asset especially for women walking through devastation, systems failing, and support disappearing. Drawing from 894 days of surviving trauma, she explains that having your own back isn’t arrogance or self-worship; it’s personal agency, stewardship, and learning to trust the mind, intuition, and resilience you’ve had to rely on to keep going. She also addresses the pushback she received from a segment of the faith community calling out spiritual bypassing, virtue signaling, and sin-leveling that can silence women or keep them stuck in unsafe situations. The heart of the episode is a grounded encouragement: you can love Jesus and still use your brain, ask questions, make plans, and take responsibility for your safety and future one doable step at a time.

Listen on your favorite platform

You can watch the full video episodes on my second YouTube channel, and the audio is available on Spotify, Amazon, Apple Podcasts and other podcast platforms.

Key Takeaways

You are not powerless if you still have you.
Your mind, body, capacity to adapt, and willingness to keep showing up are assets especially when everything else falls apart.

Learning to trust yourself is not pride, it’s survival and stewardship.
Agency isn’t rebellion; it’s taking responsibility for your one life when rescue doesn’t come.

Faith and personal responsibility can coexist.
Trusting God does not negate using your brain, gathering information, advocating, and making adult decisions.

Spiritual bypassing harms women in crisis.
Platitudes that reframe devastation as “growth” or “idolatry being torn down” can dismiss lived experience and keep women stuck or unsafe.

You don’t need certainty to move forward, just the next right step.
You don’t have to see the whole staircase. You can choose what’s doable and keep stacking days.

Resources Mentioned

• The short-form video that I created

Transcript

I could not have imagined on day 1 or day 100 what it would actually feel like and be like to make it to day 894.

Welcome back again today, friends, for the next episode of The Jamerrill Show. Now this one has the word controversial in the title. It is my controversial take on what I call being your greatest asset. You are your greatest asset. And so I’m calling this my controversial take. This is about faith, survival, and learning to have your own back.

Not long ago, I created a short-form video, just a little talk in my car one morning. It was probably 17 degrees outside and there had been a thought that I had been pondering but also applying to my own life and walking out for several weeks before. And finally, I got a decent enough handle on the thought and what I was experiencing and what I was walking out that I thought, “I’m going to do a little short-form video on this and share it with other women who this may encourage, too”.

And I will say that the short-form video that I created, that I’ll also link down in the description below, received an overwhelmingly positive response. There were over a hundred positive comments and there were probably a dozen or so that disagreed with me. And that’s okay because we don’t have to match and we do not have to agree on every single thing.

Part of what I mean when I say that you are your greatest asset is the fact that if you have yourself, you have your brain, you have your body, you have your abilities, and even if no one else has your back, you have your own back. And as long as you have yourself, you have something to work with. And this means you are the one making your own decisions and you are the one who has survived every hard thing so far.

And so when I share from my very hard lived experiences, I am not sharing this from a place where many women have followed me online for years—from 10 years ago, from 15 years ago—sharing happy, encouraging homeschool mom, happy homemaker content. What I have to share in 2026 is my lived experience as an absolutely devastated woman as I have made it through unimaginable trauma and hard seasons. I have lost a lot, just about everything. And through this experience, I have come to know myself and meet myself in ways I had never experienced in my adult life.

So, when I share from my lived experiences, you can take the encouragement and the resources and the inspiration and you can apply it to your situation, which again, we call “fill-in-the-blank” situations and circumstances around here. Your situation and circumstance may be very different than mine. Again, we may not match. If anything encourages you, gives you a pick-me-up, inspires you in any way, helps you put one foot back, helps you put one foot in front of the other today, that’s my whole goal.

If you have never known that level of devastation and you cannot relate to some of these topics that I share about, that’s also okay because there are women who are touched by these messages. And I think listening to the lived experiences of other women is very important. We can think how we would handle a situation, but unless we’ve been there and dealt with the different variables, we have no idea.

For me, when everything shook, when systems failed, when people who had always been there disappeared, when the future became terrifyingly unclear, the one thing that remained constant was me: my mind, my body, and my capacity to learn and to adapt and to keep going. And that’s not arrogance, and that’s not self-worship. That’s a harsh reality after devastation.

When you’ve been devastated, you learn to stop counting on what you thought would always be there, and you start taking inventory of what actually is. And for many women who lose so much, that inventory looks like their own mind, their own body, their own capacity to figure things out, and their own willingness to keep showing up.

Many women are taught—I was taught from the American Christian church culture—that I could not trust myself. I could not trust my thoughts. I could not trust my feelings. I could not trust my brain. I could not trust my intuition. And instead, I have been learning over these past two and a half years as I’ve been walking this journey out that my brains, my willingness to keep showing up, my willingness to keep figuring things out is my greatest asset.

So, if you’re a woman that’s on day 1 or day 100 of a total life-devastating implosion, I’m telling you what I have learned to be true for the last 894 days of my journey walking this out. And I could not have imagined. I just want to go back through time and hug myself on day 1. I could not have imagined on day 1 or day 100 what it would actually feel like and be like to make it to day 894.

I have been here for myself. I have navigated hard things I had no prior knowledge of. I have made split-second decisions under immense pressure. And I have endured situations that sounded impossible, and I’m still here. So when I share this message, woman who’s on day 1 or day 100, this is for you. I want you to know from day 894 that I am still here. I have used my brain and my intuition and my abilities I had no idea I had. And I have stacked the days and the months and the years.

Now, the dozen comments—not the hundred positive comments—are typical of the kind of comments from a segment of the faith community. And this happens to women many times in many churches, in many situations, when they show up using their words and their brains. There’s a lot of spiritual bypassing, virtue signaling, and sin leveling that takes place. I did not know the reality of these tactics until day one of my situation.

And even the fact that I will say this and discuss this, there are those who will quickly shout me down and try to shut me up. I’ve been told to not say negative things about the church, to not share my own hard stories and the hard stories of other women who were trained that they could not trust themselves. And for many women, that then leaves them in unsafe situations.

You can trust yourself. You are capable. You are not weak. I am my greatest asset because I have survived every hard day so far. And after making it through 894 days, I know I can do it another 894 days. I have built trust in myself and my ability and in my strength. And for women who are in hard situations, learning to trust yourself is a massive skill. It is highly important. And if you can trust yourself and your brain and your intuition and these skills that you are learning, that is your greatest asset.

And so, back to the dozen questions that show up. People will ask me if I’m still a Christian and if I still believe in Jesus because for so many years I talked about my faith. I had my Bible verses written on my hand. I would talk about my morning time with Jesus and reading my Bible. I had, of course, Bible verses all over my house. And I was a quiet woman. And I’ll say now, 894 days into my new journey, I love Jesus and I have questions, and I believe that Jesus is big enough to hold both of those things. I believe he can sit with us in our questions. I do not believe that questions scare him, and I do not believe he is clutching his pearls and scared because I have questions. And many people are uncomfortable when I say that. And that’s okay because I’m used to wearing a scarlet letter at this point.

And so I do want to talk about the 12 comments in particular in the “Greatest Asset” short-form video that I made in my car only because those kind of comments are the same ones that women face in the church when they try to ask questions, when they share their concerns, when they speak up with an opinion that may not match. There’s usually a rapid fire of sin leveling, of virtue signaling, of gaslighting, and devaluing the woman’s lived experience.

So overall, what I’m saying that I have learned in the last 894 days is: I am responsible for my one life. I have personal agency. I can use my mind and my body to survive and care for myself. But I think one of the concerns is when women learn to trust themselves, they may stop complying. Believing that I’m my greatest asset and encouraging women that they are their greatest asset as well does not mean that I’m replacing God. It means I’m honoring the responsibility of being alive in this body with this mind on this earth. Faith does not remove personal responsibility, and trusting God does not negate using your brain.

So this video isn’t meant to downplay faith. It’s meant for women who have found themselves with very little support left, and they had to find the strength to keep going anyway. Many women have been taught to not trust themselves and to believe that other institutions or people or headship over them will always take care of them, that these institutions will provide and protect them or even step in in some way. When that doesn’t happen, learning that you can trust yourself becomes essential. You can love Jesus and still recognize that you are the one living in your body, using your brain, making adult decisions. As long as you’re still here, you have yourself, and that matters.

So, I’m going to read a variety of comments. I’m going to read some of the concerned comments because, again, these comments that I receive don’t only apply to this video. Women in hard situations receive these accusing, faith-filled comments many times when they open their mouth.

One comment was a Bible verse: “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your path straight”. Another said, “Rejection and isolation are both for growth. It’s to tear down any idolatry we may have. The Lord does this over and over with those whom he wants to use. Joseph’s story, Moses. Stay close to the Lord and the cave is temporary, not permanent”.

And so my answer is, I don’t think it’s ever okay to say to women who have been through earth-shattering situations in which they may not be safe that rejection and isolation are for growth to tear down idolatry. That is spiritual bypassing and sin leveling at its finest. And it’s very repulsive. I have a lot of big feelings about this. Jesus never intends for women to endure hard situations in the name of tearing down implied idolatry others may think they have in their life. This video is for women who have been trained that they are weak and cannot help themselves and must rely on others. This video is for women who are learning to trust themselves, their own strength, and their brains that God has given them.

And then I got several of the, “I’m so glad I don’t have to rely on myself. Jesus is my rock and my salvation” comments. And that’s precious. But to say that to a devastated woman who may love Jesus and also has to rely on herself is not kind and that is not loving. I said I love Jesus and I have to take care of myself and be strong enough in this body and live in it to put one foot in front of the other to continue forward. There’s nothing wrong with women caring for their minds and bodies so they have the strength to do the work that is before them.

Another: “All glory to God, not to self. There would be no me without him”. I didn’t say there is no him. I said I understand that perspective. This message is for women who are actively surviving and need permission to trust their own agency and autonomy. Spiritual bypassing doesn’t help women learn how to care for themselves when they are the ones still standing. And someone liked my earrings, that’s nice.

And someone said, “Jesus is your greatest asset. He has always taken care of you. Keep your eyes on Jesus, not yourself”. And I said, “I love Jesus deeply. I also believe he doesn’t take over our agency or remove our responsibility to care for ourselves. This message is meant to encourage women who’ve had to keep going even when help didn’t come the way they were told it would”.

And again, a lot more people that just say, “Nah, I need Jesus. He’s my comfort, my strength, my encouragement, my fortress”. Cool. Jesus has walked with me and been here with me through my 894 days. And I have had to be the one to get myself up, to get myself ready, to pull tons of information together, to do the research, to open my mouth in hard situations and advocate. Jesus has not come down on a cloud from heaven and saved me from my incredibly hard situations. Now, of course, we’re not guaranteed a life that’s not hard, but we can use the brains and the creativity that he has given us to move forward and do the things that need to be done that are before us.

So, I want to bring this message back to the women who I made this video for. If this video made you exhale a little bit, this video is for you. If you are a woman who’s been devastated, if your life has been shaken and you’re counting the pieces of what you have left to work with, if people, systems, or institutions you thought would protect you didn’t show up, and if you’ve had to make impossible decisions with very little support, I want you to hear this very clearly: You have made it this far because of you. Not because you were perfect, and not because you had all the answers, and not because someone rescued you, but because you adapted. You figured out things you never thought you could. And that matters.

There are several lies women have been taught, especially in church spaces. And these lies quietly strip us of our personal agency when we need it most. Lies such as, “You can’t trust yourself. Your intuition is dangerous. Questioning means you lack faith. If you’re struggling, it’s because you’re doing something wrong. Someone else will take care of you. Just wait”. For women in real-world crisis, these beliefs don’t protect us; they freeze us.

Learning to trust yourself is not rebellion. It’s not pride. And it’s not self-worship. It’s survival. And it’s stewardship of the life that you’ve been given. You can love Jesus and still use your brain. You can have faith and still take full responsibility for your body, your safety, and your future. You can pray and still make your necessary plans. All of these things can exist at the same time.

If you’re learning how to become your greatest asset, you can learn to take the next right step. It doesn’t have to be the entire staircase at one time. You don’t need 100% certainty to move forward. You don’t need to outsource your authority. Gather the information you need, yes, but you are allowed to make your own decisions. You don’t have to have everything figured out and you don’t have to be fearless and you don’t have to arrive anywhere. You just have to stay present with yourself because as long as you are still in your body, as long as you can think and learn and adapt, you are not powerless. And trauma survivors lose their power and their personal agency through horrifying experiences. And it is a journey back to themselves to learn that their one life matters too.

You are your greatest asset. You always have been. And also I will say that I am only 894 days in my journey. But every day has counted for something. Every day has counted for truth. Every day has counted for reality. And when you’re in situations where you are not sure what’s real and you’re not sure what’s true, and when you do reach out with questions or to gather information, you’re met with messages that you can’t trust yourself and that you need to wait longer and pray harder. Those are the situations that women go through where they learn to not trust themselves, where they think, “Maybe they’re wrong. Maybe they don’t have enough faith. Maybe they don’t really understand”. So, it is a whole journey in learning that they are valuable and they can do these hard things.

I appreciate you. Thank you for being here with me on my new journey of continuing to walk out developing the Jamerrill Show and speaking about some topics that are hard and some topics that I’m still finding my footing and finding my voice with. On some shows, we’ll talk about using our dumbbell weights in the bathroom to get in some little workouts when we can. And other weeks, we’re going to talk about harder topics. I appreciate you being here with me. The show notes will be linked in the description below. And again, for the women on day one or day 100, I hope that you take big, deep encouragement from today’s episode because it was just for you.